The World's Greatest Idiots

Q: How do you keep an idiot busy for hours?
A: Give him a piece of paper with "Please turn over" written on both sides.

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An idiot decides to start up a chicken farm, so he buys a hundred chickens to get up and running.
A month later he returns to the dealer to get another hundred chickens because the first lot had died.
Another month passes and he's back at the dealers for another hundred chickens, "I think I know where I'm going wrong" he tells the dealer,
"I think I'm planting them too deep."

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Q: How do you confuse an idiot?
A: Give him two spades and tell him to take his pick.

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Did you here about the idiot who won the 'Tour De France'?
He did a lap of Honour!

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Did you hear about the stupid tap dancer?
He fell in the sink